


Annoying

by floatingpotions



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Canon Era, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Merlin is a Little Shit, arthur is tired, attempted murder by arthur, daily life, merlin and arthur bickering, merlin wants a raise, nothing new
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:33:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27042784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/floatingpotions/pseuds/floatingpotions
Summary: Why does Merlin write all of Arthur's speeches? Why is he the one mucking out the stables all the time? This was definitely NOT in the job description when Uther offered him the job. What does Gwen do all day? Is she just paid to be Morgana's special friend and comb her hair?In which Arthur makes Merlin's life miserable, so in turn he decides to return the favor out of the kindness of his own heart.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 122





	Annoying

**Author's Note:**

> i've been reading a lot of caffeinatedflumaddie and i absolutely adore her and everything she writes !! so here's my attempt to start writing again, just a small thing i don't even know what this is lol
> 
> please me gentle with me, it's been like two years noooo

Merlin wanted to scream. This was not fair, this was not right, this was not in the job description. Scowling down at the smudged piece of parchment in front of him, Merlin tried to sort through the dust particles that were all that was left of his brain at this very moment for some inkling of inspiration, hoping maybe for some divine intervention.

Of course, Prince Prat couldn’t even be bothered to write his own speeches. Merlin glared at the top of Arthur’s head, trying to channel the ungodly amount of rage in his heart into making Arthur’s head burst wide open.

Merlin stopped that abruptly. Alarmed, he peered over to check in fact whether or not Arthur’s head was still intact, though perhaps it was hard to tell, what with Arthur’s head being unfortunately empty and full of lint. Blessedly, it still was, good thing his magic didn’t take things literally then.

“Done sulking, Merlin?” Arthur’s annoying voice drawled at him.

Merlin scowled some more, glare intensifying at Arthur’s blob of a head. God, he wished he turned down the job while he still had the chance. He might not have his head right now for refusing Uther but at least he wouldn’t have to put up with Sir Snob over here.

Merlin simmered in some more of his rage, which was very much justified no matter what Arthur thought. Merlin swiped at the piece of crumpled parchment half-heartedly, which only smeared the ink all over the already messy words.

“God fucking damnit !” Merlin let out a long groan, which Arthur of course ignored. Merlin was enraged, goddamnit. He slumped down in the chair, sighing, the weight of his immortal soul crushing him. Merlin decided that it was in his best interests that he got a well-deserved break. And, that the best way to get his creative juices flowing of course was to start by annoying Arthur.

Arthur, on the other hand was (seemingly) focused on his duties, which was unfortunate for Merlin. He sighed, it was the little things really, that made his job and life so much harder than they needed to be. Merlin slumped and sulked some more, bored out of his mind with his head filled with fuzz.

To remedy that, merlin aimed a swift kick at Arthur’s knees. Arthur gave a shout of indignance, gaping at merlin with his mouth open wide. Merlin was very much unimpressed. What was Arthur acting so shocked for? Seriously, he was acting as if Merlin was ever respectful a day in his life.

“ _Merlin !”_ Arthur bellowed, aiming a kick right back, which merlin dodged skillfully. Mere months of living with Arthur had honed merlin’s reflexes to a tee. What did Arthur take him for anyway? Merlin reckoned he was the one Arthur should knight, what with all the training he had from Arthur’s frankly violent and sometimes downright murderous temper.

Honestly, _this_ was the crown prince of Camelot? Ruler of Albion? Destined to be the greatest king that ever lived? He couldn’t even write his own goddamn speeches.

“Is there something you wish to say, _merlin?”_ Arthur glowered dangerously at him. merlin only sighed, his mother only ever called his name with love and affection, but in the short few months that he spent in this godforsaken kingdom Arthur had managed to make merlin’s name sound as ugly and unpleasant as possible.

“No, A _rthur._ ” Merlin tried to pack as much venom and disdain he could into the name as he could, royal prat with his royal name. who named their kid _Arthur_ anyway? Uther, that was who, the insufferable tyrant that he was.

“you can’t call me that.” Arthur rolled his eyes, annoyed as he flicked through the pile of parchments spread out over the table unnecessarily harshly.

“well, you’re supposed to write your own speeches. Nice to see you enforce rules only when it benefits you.” Merlin shot back smugly. Annoying Arthur was his favorite thing to do, it was most satisfying. Morgana was right, as always.

And predictably, Arthur rose and took the bait. “ _Merlin,_ it hasn’t gotten through that thick skull of yours yet has it, that you can’t talk to me that way?”

Merlin snorted, nearly knocking over the inkwell which would have been disastrous for both of them. A bloodbath would most definitely have ensued if Merlin managed to destroy an entire day’s worth of work and tears in one fell swoop. It would have most definitely landed him being sacked. Again.

Though perhaps merlin would enjoy it this time round, the last time he just took the liberty of assuming that Arthur gave him a few days off. He even went to Ealdor to visit his mother. Arthur was not happy though, which was evident when merlin was kidnapped from his bed too early in the morning by a very red-faced crown prince and a very embarrassed Leon.

God, that was mortifying. All the neighbors were staring.

“I’ll talk to you however I please.” Merlin stabbed the quill forcefully into the parchment, somehow managing the poke a hole straight through the parchment.

“God, you really are useless, are you merlin?” Arthur snapped and snatched the parchment away from merlin’s hands. Rude. “ Worst servant I’ve ever had.” Arthur muttered more, squinting at the parchment trying to make sense of the mess of ink and scribbles on it.

Really Merlin thought Arthur should give him a well-deserved raise.

“I’ll have you know, I go above and beyond to do my job,” Merlin sniffed. If only Arthur knew, writing his fucking speeches was just the least of merlin’s sacrifices.

“Your handwriting really is god awful, do you know that?” Arthur threw the piece of paper at him with disgust. “Didn’t I teach you properly, can you do anything right?”

“Sack me then, if you’re so unsatisfied with my job performance.” Merlin retorted, triumphant in the knowledge that Arthur, whether he was willing to admit it or not, liked Merlin far too much to ever leave him in peace.

Arthur scowled, unable to find a rebuttal. He definitely wouldn’t be able to sack Merlin this time, unless he wanted to suffer through Lord Oswald’s feast alone. Merlin smiled pleasantly, basking in his victory, smiled widening even further as that only seemed to annoy Arthur further.

Grabbing a fresh piece of parchment from the ever present stack in Arthur’s room, Merlin dabbed the quill into the inkwell and started afresh, mind well-nourished by his bickering with Arthur.

“Lord Oswald’s a twat anyway,” Arthur stretched out his limbs, trying to stifle a yawn. “Just bang on about his sons and all his services to the kingdom and be done with it, I want to go riding.” Merlin rolled his eyes, if only it were so easy, Lord Oswald didn’t exactly have any gleaming qualities about him, and Merlin could only embellish the truth so much.

Arthur, who seemed to abandon his own work in favor of gulping down a large mouthful of wine and gazing longingly out the window turned his focus to merlin. “Oh, it can’t be that hard can it?” Arthur sneered, snatching the parchment out of merlin’s hands. “Why did I even teach you to write in the first place, I should have known you were too stupid.”

“It’s not like I didn’t know how to read before then, you useless prat.” Merlin murmured under his breath.

“What was that?” Arthur squinted at merlin.

“…What?” Merlin squinted back as innocently as he could.

“This is fine,” Arthur rolled up the parchment, tossing it onto his bed. “Come on, up you get you lazy daisy, we’re going for a ride.”

“That’s _my_ line.” Merlin grumbled. “Why do _you_ get to decide when we have a break, but when I do it I’m just lazy and the worst servant you’ve ever had?”

“I am the prince of Camelot, not to be influenced by the likes of you. Being the prince has its perks you see, not that you could ever see that even from day one but, I digress.”

“Whatever you say, Prince Prat.” Merlin stretched out on his chair some more.

Before Merlin knew it, he was on the floor, shoved off that nice chair of his, bottom sore, Arthur’s obnoxious laughter ringing in his ears.

“Race you to the stables !” Arthur sounded entirely too happy in merlin’s opinion for someone who just viciously tried to mortally wound his closest friend.

“ARTHUR!”


End file.
